The Blues

When I feel down or depressed I like to turn on the T.V. to the music stations and listen to 80’s music. While it lifts my spirits it also gets me in the cleaning mood…the deep cleaning mood where I can concentrate on what it is that was making me feel that way in the 1st place and most of the time I figure out a plan, solution or answer to what ever it may have been. On the other hand if I don’t feel like noise I will read a book in calm serenity. It’s like meditating to me.

Dreams not reality

Sleep…not a great thing for me. My mind is constantly running and when I go to bed, whether i’m tired or not makes no difference, my mind still go’s and go’s. It can take anywhere from 1-2 1/2 hrs for me to fall asleep, I currently take prescribed sleeping medication.

Yes I dream and that is one thing i’m not to fond of. My dreams aren’t like most peoples (I actually consider them more like nightmares). Example: A couple of nights ago I dreamed of waking up one morning and my parents were gone, I was around 10-12 yrs old and my older younger brother was also in the dream, he was 17-20 yrs old. Anyway I don’t remember the specifics but I remember they were gone for about a year and no-one could figure out where they went. Then one day my brother found out that they had found this program that allows you to leave your life behind and start fresh…in a different dimension. I don’t remember how he found out or how him and I ended up in this other dimension, but when we found my parents they had a beautiful house and it was like a page out of a fairy tale, blue sky, green grass, gorgeous flowers and everyone was really nice but they didn’t want anything to do with me and my brother. They did have another son when we arrived at their house and he was around a year old. The only thing they were doing was trying to get rid of us all over again, they had no idea what to do and were actually furious that we had found them. I remember being emotionally lost and as I was standing there trying to comprehend as well as figure out what I had done for them not to want me anymore I woke up.

Most of my “dreams” aren’t personal towards me like the one I have described above. Most are of people being tortured/killed or of things taking over the world like “war of the worlds” type stuff and all of them have to do with my friends/family or both. If they are really, really bad I usually wake up trying to scream (nothing comes out) and those I don’t remember as well as the one described above and I can’t go back to sleep. Those are the ones that make my heart race and I have to take a minute to realize it was a dream and not reality.

I have had people tell me that I should keep a journal of my dreams and us them as fictional story ideas…….

C.J.